Chances are, if you are either planning your celebration in the near future or just like me, someone for whom all things nuptial have over them a particular hold long before or after the big day, you will have a view on social media and weddings.
You might think enforcing a smart phone amnesty is a bit OTT and should stay the preserve of the A-list with their lucrative magazine deals, who often resort to asking guests to hand in their phones at the door a little like naughty school children (although clearly some guests at Poppy Delevingne’s recent wedding[s] were class rebels, Peter Dundas amongst them). Or you may be particularly fervent in your opinion that Instagram, Facebook and their tech-world cohorts are the nemesis of the in-the-moment romance of being alive. Especially when observing one of the most special days of someone’s life. On the other hand, you could just think it’s a lot of fuss about nothing. Or perhaps (whisper it), you could even be a bride who welcomes the diversity and fun of myriad perspectives captured in friends’ snaps of your big day.
The facts of the matter seem to be thus: almost everyone seems to own a smart phone these days, and many of your peers are conversant with not just the mediums, but the tricks and filters that can turn a ‘meh’ moment into something beautifully sigh-worthy. You are playing a losing game if you choose to try to stop snapping full stop, surely. To worry about over-exposure of your wedding day, posted ‘live’ on the panoply of platforms within seconds without your say-so – and you could argue, making the day disappear almost as soon as it occurred by seamlessly blurring it into a flurry of newsfeeds – is perhaps the ultimate First World, modern day problem and seems a trifle silly with this in mind. Although conversely, we’re told once something’s on the internet, it is always on the internet, much like an infinite library of our lives so there is that for comfort if you like the idea of your wedding living on forever and being seen by the world. It is all part and parcel of the ubiquitous instant gratification era we live in, so there’s not much point being a hater or fighting it. Or is there?
For some people, myself included as amongst the camera-shy, it can be a nightmare. Ducking a forest of cameras when trying to smile graciously or simply drink in the atmosphere of your nuptials, and being endlessly asked to strike a pose for not just your photographer, but every iPhone wielded by your guests on your wedding day can get wearisome. Plus, it really can disrupt the flow of the day beyond simply being frustrating for you, likely your parents and anyone else of a pre-3G generation who simply can’t fathom why the endless need to frame, crop, filter, upload. Hence sometimes why the etiquette of asking guests to abstain from taking pictures, even just for a portion of the day you want to enjoy camera-free, with a nicely worded note in your order of service can feel liberating. At the end of the day, it is about celebration and this is all that is being conveyed when a guest is busy snapping away. But to control it a little, to reclaim some of the old-fashioned romance of being ‘present’ and relying on your memory and day dreams for posterity is worth a thousand pretty ’grams or Facebook albums, right?